July 02, 2004 - 03:03
i keep writing here and then the computer restarts after the busy server page has finally gone away and then it won't go away again.
i need to stay up until late tomorrow morning because of the pawn shop and the paint but i've been going to sleep when it's barely light out. i hate my father hugging me when he's drunk and everyone coming and going out yelling goodbye and going on about their day. i don't go outside and i don't have a life and i hate when this room is like a lobby. it's bad at ten when everyone is either going to bed and needs to jam in that last bit of talking or going out to have fun all night and come home tomorrow morning when i'm just going to sleep. i'm using the pawn shop money to buy black and white paint to make it monochromatic and cleaner so i'll be okay spending more time in there and it won't be dark, dingy, and suffocating, a hairdryer because i'm tired of borrowing my mother's all the time, and painter's tape so the lines are smooth. and a couple cheap lamps, maybe the kind that can screw into the wall, and some spray. wow, how much money am i getting for some bad old cds and some tapes.
i'm incredibly bored and i guess i should start looking up cemeteries for two months away.